Heart; Try An Error

I couldn’t help it so I threw it all out
I erased all of my emotions
But I couldn’t erase you
Because my heart was too sad

I just need to live like this, I just need to breathe
I just need to be alive, why can’t I?
I said it’s okay
This is better for me

I was afraid that I’d get cut by your sharp, knife-like words
I just need to breathe and eat to endure through this

I was a coward, I wanted to endure through

I’m holding my heart in my hand
I chose a life that is for me

I don’t want to let go of myself
I don’t want to ruin myself anymore
Memories that aren’t ending even when it’s over
I have no confidence to win over it

Love, in the end
Is a lie to just one person
Now look at me forgetting you
With your eyes wide open

Don’t ever forget me
Don’t ever erase me

My heart was limping and this is the end of the road
After making that decision and taking a breath
I let out a deep sigh
I rip him up from inside my heart
As I let out a silent scream
I’m erasing the after images that are floating around
Burning up the remaining memories up to the sky, burn

I saw you again, I cried
Something went terribly wrong
My heart is still remembering
Everything was the same

There’s nowhere to run from you

If I hold onto you, it hurts
But if I let you go, it hurts even more
This place is deeper than a dream inside a dream
I have no confidence to escape from it

Saying that I’ll forget you
Is all a lie that remains in me
Your face spreads throughout my heart again
It hurts even more than before

I think I miss you even more
I think it’s even more dangerous

Arjuna Beta

stop growing up so fast--

Laki Baik Untuk Perempuan Baik

Kau ni--tak padanlah dengan dia.
Kau jahat.
Laki baik,untuk perempuan baik je.

Yeke der?


Sape kata?

Ustaz kata. AQ kata.

Baik yang macam mana tu?
Baiklah-- baik.

Segi mana tu?
Agama? Dunia? Akhlak? Budi?
Macam mana kau judge orang tu baik ke jahat?
Kau nampak dosa pahala?
Ke kau dah ganti malaikat.

*terdiam*

Pergh--Kejamlah macam tu.
Siapa nak kawin dengan pelacur kat bukit bintang tu?
Yang busuk forever busuk.
Pergh.

Kau perli aku ke?

Eh.
Taklah. Tak.
Manusia tu kejam.
Tuhan tu tak.

*sigh*

Tuhan bilang;
Jodoh tu adalah yang terbaik untuk kamu.
Kamu adalah terbaik untuk dia. God know better.he know best.

Tapi since manusia dah gantikan malaikat,mau mentadbir langit.
Dosa pahala. Jahat baik.
Semua kau hidu.
Kau jela tentukan. Ye dak?

Mau baik berubah pd sisi tuhan.mak bapak.

Bukan kau pertikaikan layak atau tidak dia untuk aku.

Rama-Rama Malam

Kita makin lama makin besar--
Dulu masa nak tumbuh "dada baru".
Baju ke main besar--jalan bongkok malu dengan kawan2 laki.
Kawan2 perempuan main raba2.
Konon funny nak rasa "dada baru".
Abang tegur;
Ada apa dalam baju?
*blushing*

Biasalah manusia--
Sukakan perhatian.
Makin lama.
Makin hilang malu.
Makin kurang kain.
Baju ketat-ketat sampai nampak dada matang.

*gasp*

Bila mana buaya pandang--usha kau bawah atas.
Buaya tak kira umur.
Tua--muda--
Buaya tak kira bangsa.
Nepal--melayu--cina--bangla
Tak kira status.
Bujang--berkawin--duda

Bila lalu--
Orang say 'hi'.
Orang pandang macam top american supermodel.
Flirting like a shit.

Aku rasa aku 'hot'.
Wa nak tunjuk six pack wa.

Gila?
Siapa tak 'like' barang murah?

*deep*

Tapi aku bodoh--
Jadi bahan zina mata.
Aku lewa.
Biasalah.
Manusia.

Entah. Sampai jadi bahan dinding toilet kot?
Sediakan sabun.

Kena sentuh. Kena raba. Orang melucah. Kena cabul.
Menangis bawa shower.
Macam air boleh lunturkan dosa di cipta sendiri.

Serba serbi kau rasa jantan tu barua.
Jijik.
Sampai satu tahap
kau sedar;

Yang jijik tu kamu.